I am starting to “see,” literally, the variability in my mindfulness. My vision sharpens and dulls as I watch the picture in front of my eyes becomes less or more blurry.

And the pictures in my mind tradeoff with the sharpness I see in the picture of reality, like my mental images are holographically printed over what I see of the real world.

For example, I see my mother and wonder who will take care of her when she is older; even though, in the present reality, I am holding a half-eaten sandwich at lunchtime. I have entirely forgotten about it and replaced it with the mental image of my mother and the emotions that came along with thinking of her.

Until, of a sudden, I think to myself, “I am not being mindful.” Or, “I am not present.” Or something else to remind me of my present and physical state, so that I really start to “see” again, and register the picture of my hand holding a sandwich, as the mental idea of my mother floats away.