In my meditation, I cut through my shallow purposes, and realize that time and time again, I set goals and do not achieve them. For example, tonight around seven o’clock I started to read East of Eden by Steinbeck. I promised myself that I would read fifty pages before I went to sleep. I read six pages. Now it’s almost ten o’clock. I’ve just had dinner and I’m getting tired. I think to myself, maybe I’ll just go to sleep and read more of the book tomorrow.

Similarly, my later goals have slipped away. This happens for two reasons. One, I lose sight of my ‘why,’ my deeper purpose. Two, I rationalize that the goal is not essential to my purpose, or that it can be adjusted in timeline or magnitude without harming my progress toward my purpose. I rationalize that I need to be relaxed and healthy, not always so determined and gritty. I give into my desires for sleep, pleasure, and social life, instead of staying committed. I allow short-term feelings to supersede my long-term goals. Three, my goals are not specific enough. For example, today after a 7-mile run, I’m tired and feel like laying in bed and reading. This isn’t necessarily against my progress because I haven’t set a specific goal for today. I need to set specific goals for Saturday and Sunday.

Why do I want to write a best-selling novel? How do I do it, and do my current goals and habits align with this?